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It's apparently been a while since I last used this thing. I've been paring down my thoughts to fit the briefer Facebook and even Twitter formats. But, you know, no time like the present to resurrect this thing. Especially since People magazine just named Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson as the Sexiest Man Alive.

Not a bad choice. Certainly there have been worse in the history of People magazine, some of which were awful only in hindsight, while others were dreadful right out of the gate. As far as these things go, The Rock is one of their better picks, right up there with Hugh Jackman, George Clooney, and Chris Hemsworth, as far as I'm concerned.

But is he my pick? Well... no. He does have a few things in common with my pick, though, being an egregiously tall, well-built professional wrestler.

Without further ado, I give you my Sexiest Man Alive for 2016: the awesomely talented Donovan Dijak.

You're welcome.
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According to People magazine, it's some musician douche named Adam Levine who, because I am old, has evaded my cultural radar. For the first and possibly last time in my life, let me say: hooray for old! What was People thinking? This dude is about as sexually appealing as a yeast infection.

No, no, no, my friends. The choice for sexiest man of the year is so clear, so blatantly obvious, that I fail to see how People could possibly have missed it. Perhaps no one in their offices searches the internet?

It is Tom Hiddleston, of course*. I am not the only person who feels this way, presumably because obvious choice is obvious.



*Although I am willing to concede that a very compelling case can be made for Idris Elba.

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